Resisting the Ego’s Pull

As I've discussed previously, the key lies in resisting the powerful pull of the ego that urges us to succumb to negativity. It's a daunting task.

Many people I've spoken with share a common sentiment: this force feels almost impossible to resist, and there's little time to regain our composure and resist its temptation. For instance, when your partner makes a hurtful comment, you have mere seconds to choose not to retaliate, which could lead to ruining your day, week, or even your relationship. Does this resonate with anyone?

So, let’s delve into practical strategies that can assist us in that fleeting moment between the trigger and our reaction.

My Personal Experience at the Pool

During a recent swim, I encountered a situation that tested my patience. Swimming laps is not my favorite activity; in fact, I’m quite slow, usually second only to my father, who looked like he was swimming backward.

To illustrate my slowness, my eleven-year-old daughter recently had to swim 100 yards in under a minute and forty seconds for a junior lifeguard program. I thought I'd give it a shot and my time was 2:10, while she completed it in 1:30.

Why do I persist with swimming? It’s an excellent workout that is beneficial for my body, especially after regular tennis sessions.

However, my last visit to the pool was particularly important as I had strained a quadricep muscle playing tennis. Unfortunately, when I arrived, all four lanes were filled—something that rarely happens.

Waiting is not my strong suit, and after a few moments, I saw an older woman leave the pool. Just as I thought I could swim, another swimmer swooped in to take her lane, forcing me to wait longer.

As I sat there, I felt frustration bubbling up:

“Just my luck; on the day I need to swim, there are no lanes!”

“Why are they taking so long?”

In the midst of this internal struggle, I recalled a valuable lesson from my spiritual mentor, Mickey Singer:

“DON’T TOUCH IT!”

This phrase became my mantra. What was I not supposed to touch? That intense urge to succumb to negativity.

Mickey advises that when we feel this powerful pull, we should relax completely. Instead of engaging with that energy, we should lean away from it and observe it.

Each time I felt my anger rising, I repeated those three words, allowing myself to relax and avoid reacting.

Eventually, I decided to leave the pool, but I felt good about my choice. I had successfully resisted the urge to let my mood sour, which could have affected my entire day.

The Key Takeaway

The next time you find yourself upset and that familiar wave of anger washes over you, try this approach:

• RELAX immediately, focusing on releasing tension throughout your body, especially in your head, shoulders, and chest.
• LEAN AWAY from that negative feeling.
• Remind yourself, “Don’t touch it!” Keep repeating this until you feel completely relaxed and the urge subsides.

Life is too precious to let small things ruin your day. If this technique resonates with you, consider adding it to your toolkit for maintaining a positive mindset.

Thanks for taking the time to read this!