The Enchantment of New Beginnings: Embracing the Unknown
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Chapter 1: The Essence of Starting Anew
Starting something new takes courage! Our contributing writer, Leonard G. Heygster, explores whether there is indeed magic in new beginnings and how we can uncover it for ourselves.
Consider if Hermann Hesse meant it when he said, "There is magic in every beginning." It's an idea that many might envy. Who among us hasn’t approached a new endeavor with reluctance, devoid of excitement? Perhaps we’re only motivated by the necessity to pass a test or meet other obligations.
But hold on: just because we don’t recognize the magic doesn’t mean it isn’t there. Could Hesse be onto something after all?
In a recent episode of the humanarehappy podcast, trauma therapist Dami Charf discusses the art of starting. It becomes evident that beginning is more than just that; it’s time we distinguish between various kinds of initiation.
Section 1.1: The Driving Forces Behind a New Start
Dami Charf explains that when we embark on something new, it often stems from an impulse. This impulse can manifest in different ways:
For instance, do I possess a compelling "why" that propels me forward? This "why" is always purposeful and helps guide us toward a specific goal.
Alternatively, we might follow an inherent urge to explore. Many of us can recall childhood moments of unrestrained curiosity—venturing into the world simply to discover, where the act of exploration itself holds more significance than the findings.
Section 1.2: The Balance of Impulse and Discipline
An initial impulse can generate significant energy, which is essential for taking the first step. Is this the magic Hesse referred to? However, if I constantly start new projects without finishing them, where does that leave me?
According to Dami Charf, while the initial impulse motivates us to begin, discipline is crucial for following through. Yet, not continuing with something doesn’t equate to failure. Sometimes, reassessing a situation can lead to meaningful adjustments—this can pave the way for a fresh start.
For example, if I typically jog on a specific day but it’s pouring rain, I might not feel inclined to go outside. I could force myself to run, but if I choose to enjoy a cozy afternoon instead, I might realize that this approach is more fulfilling.
Dami Charf poses a vital question: "Is it adaptation or submission? They're different flavors."
Chapter 2: Finding Security in New Beginnings
Taking risks often involves relinquishing a sense of safety—this dilemma can hinder many from embarking on new paths.
"Many harbor dreams but categorize them as unreachable, preventing them from making the leap due to fear," explains the trauma therapist. She highlights the profound freedom that can emerge from inner security:
Without finding this freedom and understanding the sources of our security, we may remain trapped in a cycle of seeking false safety.
Where do we derive our sense of security?
Feeling secure usually doesn’t come from a single source; it’s often built upon various pillars that hold different significance for each individual.
Some may find safety in social connections or belonging to a community, while others may rely on stable employment. Still, others derive security from their self-connection or nature.
Dami Charf emphasizes that a new beginning should not threaten any of these pillars. Individuals lacking self-security frequently attempt to gain control, but complete control is merely an illusion: "The world is unpredictable. Those who feel insecure often strive for control, but this rarely fosters genuine security."
Instead, it’s crucial to focus on creating more space and security within ourselves.
The first video, "THERE IS NO MAGIC WAND | Pastor Paul Daugherty | (Series: This Year I Will)," explores the idea that tangible change requires effort rather than relying on fantasy.
Section 2.1: The Role of Safety in Exploration
When we feel secure, initiating new endeavors becomes more manageable. This is particularly evident in children, as Dami Charf notes in her interview.
Children exhibit pronounced exploratory behavior when they feel safe. They often check to see if their caregiver is present before venturing out. "As long as they feel secure, they will continue to explore their surroundings."
However, when children experience insecurity, it can limit their willingness to explore, creating a lasting impact.
The second video, "There is No Magic in this Book - Teaser," further delves into the notion that real-life experiences shape our understanding of the world, rather than relying on fantastical narratives.
Section 2.2: The Impact of Structured Lives
Dami Charf points out that anxiety disorders among young adults are at an all-time high, possibly due to overly structured childhoods. This phenomenon, akin to helicopter parenting, restricts children from experiencing essential challenges.
While parents may believe they are protecting their children, they often prevent them from learning how to navigate pain. This ability to cope with discomfort can ultimately bolster the inner security needed to embrace the unfamiliar and embark on new beginnings.
In addition, childhood and teenage lives tend to be highly structured, leaving little room for exploration. "The lives of school-age children are as chaotic as those of their parents. If there is any downtime, they often resort to their phones—this lifestyle doesn’t prepare them for the real world."
Section 2.3: The Quest for Magic in New Beginnings
What if you felt both safe and free within yourself, while also having the time to explore new opportunities? Certainly, every new beginning would still involve risk, accompanied by uncertainty and perhaps fear—the challenge of letting go of the familiar can feel daunting.
Yet, maybe that’s precisely where the enchantment resides. Who can say for certain?