Chapter 1: The Rise of Group Chats

It seems like group chats are taking over our lives! I recently had a strange dream where I found myself trapped in a chat group, unable to contribute a single word.

Photo by Jason Rosewell on Unsplash.

Group chats have become the new norm—if you’re not involved in them, you might feel left out of today’s society. This insight comes from a recent article in the New York Times Sunday Magazine by Sophie Haigney, a self-proclaimed Group Chat Expert (GCE) who boasts over 16,000 followers on Twitter/X and received a notable payment for her work—more than I’ve ever earned for my writing. Interestingly, I’m a full 70 years older than her. You can read the full article (without my interruptions) here.

As I read her thoughts (I’m a dedicated subscriber to the print edition of the Times), I found myself engaging in an imaginary dialogue with the GCE. Some of her statements I only envisioned. Regardless—

Me: It seems you’re constantly texting, primarily in group chats.

GCE: Absolutely! I participate in countless group chats—“constant, interconnected text-message conversations among multiple friends throughout the day. I’m constantly in and out of these discussions, whether on my phone or computer. Sometimes, I’ll set both aside for a couple of hours and return to find 279 new messages waiting.”

Me: That sounds overwhelming.

GCE: That’s typical of someone from your generation. “I’m under 30, so my focus has always been split, if not completely shattered, by the constant nature of digital communication. Thus, I’m constantly texting the chat.”

Me: I’m curious about what you chat about.

GCE: “Well, someone might share a link to an article, a life update, or a joke—another joke, a really silly joke, a reading suggestion, or a funny image…”

Me: Wait! A reading suggestion? Do group chatters actually pause long enough to read a book?

GCE: (No response, but continues) “As I was saying, there’s often a heated discussion about some online controversy we’re privately debating, or something from our real lives that we need to analyze…”

Me: I don’t find much in my life that requires analysis.

GCE: “Oh, you Older People. The essence of my experience is tinted by the feeling that I’m in constant conversation with all my friends.”

Me: I fear my friendships might not endure this. Can you shed light on how we arrived at this group chat reality?

GCE: Certainly. “In 2008, Apple enabled the capability to text multiple people simultaneously, and over the following decade, group chats evolved from a handy tool to an omnipresent social trend.”

Me: I see your point about its prevalence. But I understand that with group chats, you feel like you’re “whispering in your friends’ ears” constantly. Is this, as you claim, “a form of deception?”

GCE: “Instead, I would argue it’s full of potential.”

Me: Wow, I hadn’t considered it that way. Could group chats really evolve into a global trend?

GCE: “In a good group chat, conversations may pause, but they never truly end. This continuity has implications we may not fully grasp, extending beyond the small circles we create.”

Me: Could you elaborate on that?

GCE: “That ‘thinking together,’ engaging back and forth in real-time, (GCE pointed out the group chats among Fox News hosts that led to the network's legal troubles with Dominion Voting Systems) moving toward something vague yet tangible—that’s the essence of a group chat.”

Me: I understand. You also mentioned your own chats—

GCE: “...a mix of links and various discussions that start and stop. I imagine people venting about different issues. Unknowingly, they may create something together—however undefined—a community based on shared values and interests, reinforced daily by small interactions… Then someone raises a question about a bank’s stability, and chaos ensues.”

Me: I’ve noticed a lot of that lately. Chaos isn’t my idea of enjoyment—but I guess I’m just an Old Person. I still appreciate calm and rationality.

GCE: “People often act irrationally, based on limited info, but there’s something unique and perhaps unprecedented about this many influential individuals reacting so quickly, their responses bouncing off one another in a digital space, then spilling into the real world and impacting millions financially.”

Me: Aren’t you concerned about erratic individuals in these groups?

GCE: “The ‘group’ aspect is essential, but it’s the chatting—the continuous digital dialogue—that’s vital.”

Me: Understood.

GCE: “This is another facet technology has integrated into our lives. I can’t claim it’s entirely beneficial…”

Me: (interrupting) Way to go!

GCE: “…but I feel it’s, on the whole, additive, constructive rather than isolating. In the realm of group chats, your social world buzzes with activity, at all times, at your literal and figurative fingertips. ‘Conversation’ transforms into something larger, more chaotic, and less clearly defined, yet it resonates alongside me, even as I’m meant to be focusing on writing this right now.”

Me: Thanks! I need to go take some Tylenol.

Chapter 2: Conversations and Community in Group Chats

This video, "2 Years Later... | The Group Chat Podcast #100," explores the evolution and impact of group chats on our social lives.

In "OMGOSH what to do in if you get in a mom fight!" learn effective strategies for navigating conflicts within group chats and maintaining harmony.